authonomaholism

This is the latest disease, as I think I mentioned before, the Harper Collins run website 'authonomy' can take over your life. I am serious. I now get up at 7am and read, comment, go onto the forum, trawl through the ratings, for at least 3 hours, before going to work, coming home and doing the same again. If that isn't an addiction, I don't know what is.

To make matters worse, someone has infiltrated the site and is not playing 'by the rules'. By using Facebook, youtube and every other such site, he managed to persuade thousands of people to back his book (which, to add insult to injury, wasn't even finished). It then shot to the number one slot, so HC will take a look at it, while the rest of us have slogged away, reading and commenting on hundreds of books, watching our rankings very gradually creep up. I suppose, if I had the will, or the technological knowledge, I could do the same, but I just know it wouldn't work for me.

The problem is that, not only have I neglected my husband, the housework, the dogs, the children, and the garden, I have begun to alienate good friends. I can see their eyes glazing over as I start every sentence with 'On authonomy today I read....' I can see their thought bubbles popping out of their brains, 'Oh shit, not another bloody authonomy story. Here we go'.



So, I am checking into rehab, feeling about as enthusiastic as Amy Winehouse, but realise that my life has reached rock bottom, my book has peaked and troughed, and I may as well go out before it sinks back into the 1000's. At the moment, it's a respectable 100. See, I can't quite let go, even now.

But wait, if I give it up, it means I HAVE to resume my writing, there are no more excuses not to face it. And I'm not sure I'm quite ready for that, being totally devoid of any sort of inspiration. So, what the hell, pass us the bottle of Chardonnay and the lap top, and I'll just have one last little look at where I am in the ratings, and perhaps take a look at just one more book. It looks quite good, and they might like mine and might put it on their shelf, even if just for a day. Then I might hit the 95th rank - and then only 90 more to go before I get on the Harper Collins desk and someone who might actually have some influence will read my book. And then..... the 'Waterstones book signing' fantasy again.

Addicted to authonomy

Well, I have now been on 'authonomy' for several months, though it seems like forever. It is definitely an addiction.

For those who don't know (though since I talk about nothing else these days, you all should) authonomy is the Harper Collins run website where authors post their books and critique each others. Your book (hopefully) goes up in the ranking as more people 'shelve' it and you end up (hopefully) in the top five, at which point HC will read your book and (hopefully) publish it! DaDa.

Now, you might think that sounds quite easy, but you're wrong. It's actually as demanding as suckling a voracious infant.

For a start, you have to spend at least five, headache inducing hours a day, reading endless books, some of which you might not choose to read, but have to, in hopes of getting shelved by the author.

Then you have to think of positive things to say, rather than the (sometimes) truth, which is, 'This book is crap. You have no future in writing whatsoever.' I have only actually felt this about 3 times. There is an awful lot of good stuff on here, some of it, very very good. (buggar)

Nice comments, sooth ones ego; negative ones destroy it. Luckily, most people are quite nice.

So, on my 'holiday' in Dubai, I spent a large portion of my time, logging onto authonomy, in hopes of keeping my book going up, which it has been doing, (though slower than watching paint dry).

Then, this morning, after only ONE day when I was unable to get onto it due to a long flight/bus ride home, panic set in.

The usual green arrow which indicates that it is still climbing, was replaced by an ominous yellow bar, which tells everyone that it is now staying put. This will shortly be followed by: the dreaded red (down) arrow.

This spells the end, because people tend to stop backing books which are going down, since it doesn't do their kudos as a 'critique' any good to back unpopular books. You are, officially, a 'loser'.

Since I only had very faint fantasies about ending up in the top five, I am not overly disappointed, though having only reached 150, I feel a bit deflated.

So, I am looking for the positives (most unlike me).

1. I have come out with a much better, tighter book. I have taken most of the editing advice and changed much of the narrative into dialogue and really tried to 'show', rather than 'tell' - a concept I found very difficult to get my head round, and don't think I have, entirely.
2. I have also made some 'friends', people I have clicked with, and seen some of them reach the top, which is very gratifying. Even though I do feel just a tiny pin prick of jealousy.
3. I have seen some stuff which makes my book look like the work of a genuis (though I know I shouldn't need to compare myself to anybody, because I should just have belief in my book for its own merits. But, I don't, and I can't help comparing it).

By the way, if you want to see my book (or others) you can look on www.authonomy.com and register to read. If you want to comment, I think you have to sign up and pay a small amount.

I'm tempted to pay people to comment on mine, but think that may be cheating.