My writing...?

I keep forgetting that this started its life as a 'writer's blog'. I seem to have gone off onto all sorts of tangents and really these are just my random thoughts. 'Random' being the operative word.



Well, perhaps that's because my writing is going, but only very very slowly. I flit from editing my original book (new title, now called 'God's Away on Business') to my 'memoirs', which are very nearly finished, at least ready to edit. Then there is my really (terrifyingly) serious book, but I need to get to Brighton to do some research, something I find rather daunting (research, not Brighton!).


I actually seem to spend more time on this website called 'authonomy', which is run by Harper and Collins, and is a forum for writers. It is unbelievably difficult for someone like me, but you basically have to persuade people to read and comment on your book, and hopefully put it on their 'bookshelf' (ie support it) so that the publishers will start to take notice of it. Since I tend to tell everyone how bad and rubbish my books are, I haven't made any huge steps forward yet! I have tried to be pushy, and contacted a few people whose books I really like, hoping they will like mine too. It's a sort of 'you scratch my back, I'll scratch yours' type scenario. The complication comes in the form of being the most successful talent spotter - I don't understand this bit, but think it's rather like supporting someone in Strictly Come Dancing and almost 'betting' on their novel being really popular. I have read some dross, which is encouraging as it makes my book look so much better, but then I got some quite negative comments, which hurt, even though I know they shouldn't.


I am feeling disheartened. It feels like nothing will ever happen at the moment. No matter how many times I tell myself that my book is good enough to be published, the nagging little monster of self doubt rears its ugly head and says, spitefully, 'No it isn't'. This voice tends to win.



So, I am desperately trying to be 'positive', to tell myself that all this agony will give birth to even more creativity. Meanwhile, I continue to wash up at the pub - my hands look even more ancient than Madonna's, which is depressing. Although some kind soul from the 'authonomy' website told me you can get gel nails, so I may look into that. Also, my bank account is worryingly empty.

One piece of good news. I entered a 'Christmas Chillers' competition and was on the short list! Hooray. Sadly, they put my name down as 'Robert Stopford'. Typical.